To know my grandpa

{Grandpa and me}

♥

Last week I told you a story about my grandpa and how he always gave us candy and a quarter at the end of every visit. I painted him in a dark way - telling that he was mostly grumpy but was happy when handing out candy. When I hit the "Publish Post" button and sent it out into the world wide web I felt a twinge of guilt for portraying him in that way.

I sat down at the beginning of the week and started writing a list of things about my grandfather. I wanted to tell a different story about him that would portray him in a kinder manner. I came up with quite a list of things about him, and then I emailed that list off to my mom for clarification and filling-in-the-blanks here and there. When I received her reply I was surprised at my reaction. I cried when I read about his hardships growing up, and I was overcome with a sense of empathy and love for my grandpa - this man who loved his grandchildren so much but was at a loss to know how to show it at times.

I tried to incorporate what my mom had written about her father into my list of things I knew about him. I couldn't make it work. Call it writer's block - or maybe it was because I was at a loss for how to say it better than my mom had.

So, instead of the long list of random facts about my grandfather, I'm pasting my mom's paragraph here for you to read for yourself. {Thanks, Mom, I hope you don't mind!}

"His name was actually spelled "Johnie" - looks like whoever filled out the birth record couldn't read or write either. Grandpa was one of 6 so when the oldest 2 left [after the death of his mother], he was left at home with 3 others. I think he was around 10 or 11 when he got polio and spent several years in and out of the hospital in Oklahoma City - part of that time in an iron lung, an old method of treating the disease. After 21 surgeries on his foot and a steel plate in his ankle, he still walked with a limp his whole life. He left Oklahoma when he was about 30.

The most remarkable thing about his talents, besides being able to figure "sums" with the best of them, was the fact that he was an ace mechanic. He could repair and rebuild any engine - whether it was a car or farm equipment. And Grandpa's excuse for never reading in front of anyone? "I don't have my glasses." He was a hard man, the result of a very hard life, but he loved his grandkids way more than his own kids. You don't need to tell that - this is for your benefit only!"

I left that last sentence in because I loved it, and when I look at old photos I can see it. I'm sure he didn't love his grandchildren more than his own kids, but possibly was at an age where he could appreciate the love for a child in a different way.

I'm so grateful that I asked my mom to tell me the story of my grandpa.

Who do you know that would be different in your eyes if you knew their real story?

♥

{I'm linking to Sian's Storytelling Sunday today.}