An open letter to all the lovely ladies of Team Teal~~~~~
I sometimes feel I over-use the words “thank you”. I thank the lab tech who draws my blood, I thank the doctor after a sometimes painful exam and then I thank the chemo nurse for setting up my infusions. You might say I’m a very thankful person.
However, until February, 2011-- birth date of Team Teal -- I never thought much about how the words “thank you” could never be enough. There must be a better term when something touches your heart so deeply and lifts your spirits to the point of soaring--and all I can say is “thank you”? Come on, there’s got to be a better way!
Well, that’s the way Team Teal has made me look at life--to be a lot more thankful, grateful and in awe of the kindness of total strangers. From the cards -- both beautifully hand crafted and the specially selected store-bought -- to the yummy sweets (thanks, Mel!) and the precious pictures (thanks, Ruth), my cup is full to overflowing!
I don’t know how much Deb has shared with you but after a 10 week break from chemo, I’ve started treatment again and have had 2 sessions 21 days apart. The PET scans I had in November have shown the cancer has spread and my CA125 numbers (cancer antigen blood test for ovarian cancer) were at an all time high on January 10, 2012 when I went for my first treatment after the 10 weeks off. They were sitting at 9,200, almost twice as high as they were when I was diagnosed last February (normal reading is anything under 35 points). Scary? Oh, yeah!
I refuse to let the doctor give me a prognosis. I don’t need negative thoughts right now. I’m praying daily for a miracle, even though at the same time, the guilt of asking for one is sometimes overwhelming. I’m just one person in a sea of millions who all want miracles.
I’ve got an amazing husband (again, amazing doesn’t come close to describing him. Better word here?). My incredible children and grandchildren --who are a constant reminder of what I have created and contributed to this earth in my nearly 70 years--I’m so proud of each of them. I’ve decided to not think about what I’ll miss, but rather what I’ve had. And it’s been wonderful!
I also want you all to know how I appreciate all you do for Deb. Your encouraging comments on her blog along with e-mails and happy mail help keep her spirits high which helps her be even more of an encouragement to me. IF things should “go south” I know you’ll all be there to help her through.
I hope to be writing another letter like this every year for the next 20 years--if God allows. Until then, I suppose we’ll all have to be satisfied with “thank you so much” until I can come up with a better phrase.
God bless each and every one of you for your prayers, loving thoughts and beautiful happy mail!
My love to all of you!
♥ ♥ ♥