Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Where is Heaven?

Last year, on the day that my mom died, Carrie and I ended up back at my sister’s house for the night, and my nephew Stone, who was four at the time, had some serious questions about his grandmother.
 
“Where IS Grandma Marti?” he wanted to know.
 
Yikes! In that moment he might as well have asked me where babies come from! I wasn’t sure what to say - what my sister would want me to say - and before I could think too long I blurted out, “She’s in heaven.”
 
“Where is heaven?” he persisted, and I pointed up toward the ceiling.
 
Stone looked confused. “Up on da woof?” he asked.
 
Oh my sweetness. “No, Stoney,” I told him. “Heaven is way way up in the sky.”
 
“Up past the planes and helicoptews and wocket ships?” he asked.
 
“Yes, sweetheart, way up high.” He looked sad but satisfied with my answers.


Over the past year since my mom has been gone, Stone will often look to the sky at night and find the brightest star. He’ll claim it as "Grandma Marti’s star," and many times he’ll say hello or shout “I LOVE YOU, GRANDMA!” as he looks upward.
 
Recently, as he sat under the stars with his mother he looked skyward and said, “Hi Grandma. You look beautiful tonight.”
 
My sister asked, “Do you remember what Grandma looks like?”
 
Stone was quick to reply, “Blonde hair, black shirt, black pants, white shoes, peach arms…”
 
My sister texted me to tell me about their recent conversation and before I could text her back she said what I was thinking, “Mom would never wear white shoes with black pants!”
 
Gosh, we miss her something terrible, but these little conversations, the little ways we remember her, are just so precious. I love the sweet and innocent way that Stone remembers his grandmother. She would love to know that he sees her in the stars...
 
...way up past the planes and helicoptews and wocket ships.

21 comments:

Karen said...

What a beautiful post, Deb! These are the special moments that help us remember those we've lost. Stone has it just right!

Ruth said...

Oh, what a darling boy he is. It's so hard for them to understand the concept of dying, but I'm glad he sees Marti in the stars. X

Sian said...

"peach arms"..wouldn't she just love to know she was remembered for those arms. I bet they gave plenty of hugs!

Robyn said...

oh my gosh! I love this!!

Susi said...

Such a lovely post. I love that he sees her in the stars and tells her that she is beautiful.

Alison said...

I love that Stone talks to his grandma in the stars!! I always think of the first star I see at night being Stuart just checking in on me
Alison xx

debs14 said...

How sweet!

Joanie's Trendy Quilts said...

What a touching story. How wonderful that Stone can talk to his Grandma looking at the stars and tell her she is beautiful!

Valerie said...

Thanks for posting this Deb---made me tear up!!! Mom would be so touched by this post! Miss her! Love you!

Becky said...

What a wonderful post and great tribute to Grandma Marti xx

Rhona said...

What a beautiful post Deb. How sweet that Stone still thinks of and talks about/to your Mom. And how great that you've captured it so you'll always remember :)xx

scrappyjacky said...

Such a lovely way to remember her....when my brother died,DD2 [aged 6]would look skywards and point to the brightest star and say "there's Andrew". I'm sure that to children there's something magical about stars.

Miriam said...

There is something magical about the stars to me, I looked out tonight and saw the brightest star and was thinking about my mum x A lovely post x

Alanna said...

What a lovely post Deb. I was so touched. Love your paper turtle sweetie.

Audrey said...

Oh Deb, please excuse me while I go find some tissues. Oh the heartstrings. Whew. When Alain's brother passed away, my nephew was turning two. He'd been SO close to his father and also asked over and over, "Where's Papa". We also said something similar...up high in the sky. Still, to this day, all he wants to do is swing and he wants to be pushed as high as humanly possible. And we all know why. It really is crushing but so, so beautiful. Thank you for sharing....so much. XOXO

Maria Ontiveros said...

And I believe your mom is up there too, whispering to Stone every now and then. The ones we love never leave as long as we remember them in our hearts.
rinda

Irene said...

Loving your post today. Keeping you and your family in my prayers.

Amy said...

I think children have such a profound way of expressing loss and grief at times.

Sinead said...

I'm almost in tears Deb. I love how children can express in words and gestures the things that us adults fumble and stutter over. Sending thoughts and hugs your way xxx

Jo said...

What a beautiful way to remember Grandma x

Anonymous said...

Oh Deb, what a wonderful post. I love that he sees his Grandma up in the stars.

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